许富翔独宠陈意涵的背后：一个男人是不是真的爱你，就看3个细节

 “xingfujiushiwozaixiao，nizainao。”zheiyangdeganqingzhuangtaizhendehenrangrenxianmu，nanshengyoushihouhuikunhuo，buzhidaonvshengzhenzhengxihuanshenmeyangdenansheng。

youdenanshengbaqiuaishibaiguijiuyu：nvshengyankong、baijin。

 qishinvshengzhenzhengzaiyideshinanshengdetaidu。dangnanshengbushufunvshengshi，jiyuzugoudexinrenhexinshang，nvshengfanerhuizhudongzoujinta，jinruyiduanmeihaodezhangqiguanxi。

1、不压抑对方天性

《xingfusanzhongzou》bochujiuhuodewangyoureyi。yuanqishaonvchenyihanhelaogongxufuxiangdehudongtianmiderangrenxianmu。

 linxinrubukeqidishuo：“wobujuedexufuxiangkeyizhuidaozheimezhengdenvmingxing。”chenyihanzirandijieguohua，“xiexie，woyehenrongxingkeyijiajita。”

 ruguozhishuodaozheilihaikeyilijieweikeqi。danshixiajuzhenshirangningmengwangyousuanle，chenyihanshuo：“womeicibanyeshuixingdeshihou，xiangdaowokeyijiajixufuxiang，zhenshiwozheibeizizuixingfudeshi。”

 beipiaolianglaopobiaobaidexufuxiang，nanshengmenbujinxinlisuansuande，qimaobuyangdetadaodiyongshenmebanfazhuidaoyuanqishaonv，hairangtasixintadi？

 biaomiankanchenyihanzhaoleyigeyanzhichajuhendadelaogong，qishitayouhenduo“neixiu”，biaomianshangbuxianyan，danhenyouneihan，xiangchuqilaihenshufu。

 biruxufuxianghenyoushenghuoqingdiao，zuofannashou，suishouzhenglidexiguanhenzan，chenyihanxiangshuijue，xiangwanpintu， bayumaotaozaitoushanggaoguai，tadouxiaozhegulita。

erchenyihanyerentongtadejiazhiguan，yuanyitingtayijian。

 chenyihanzhailizi，xufuxianghuiyibenzhengjingrangtaduilizishudaoqian，huanqitanvshengkenengjiuzhale，danshichenyihanjuededuie，jiuliuleweixinerweimazaishangmian，yuanyipeifu。

 qishizaizheilixuduichenjiushidianxingdechongerbujiao。butongyumeiyuanzedishuncong、fuwuduifang，nanshengjinvshengbianjiegan，yindaota，nvshenghuigengyouxingfugan。

 youdenanshengdananzizhuyi，juedeshenghaizi、zuojiawujiushinvshengdeshi，haiyaonvshengbixuwenroutitie，zheiyangbudanzhaobudaoyigexinganqingyuanweitajiawudenvsheng，yemeiyouwenroudenvhaixuanzetamen。

 fanguanyouxienanshengxiangxufuxiangyiyangdongdexinshangnvsheng，zunzhongtamendeaihaohegexing，shidangjitamenbaoliukongjian，nvshengfanerwenroushanjierenyi，yuanyiquweixiaojiafuchu。nanshenggongzuomangdeshihou，tamenzhudongzuojiawu，youshangyouliang，buqujijiaosheizuoduozuoshaozheixiesuoshi。

hunhoudexufuxiangmeiyoushezhitiaotiaokuangkuangjizijideqizi，ershigulihezhichitaquzuoxihuandeshi。

 yunqichenyihanpaobu，wangyouhanhuataweixian，renweiduihaizibufuzeren，talaogongyemeiyoubandianganshedeyisi，taxiangxinzijilaopodepanduan。

zaixufuxiangzheili，chenyihankeyiziyoudizuoziji。suoyiwomenkandaodeta，yijiushiyuanqishaonv，xingfuxiezailianshang。

2、适度放手反而得到对方的心

 dianshiju《paomozhixia》liouchenyikaishiduixiamokongzhiyuhenqiang，yiduyinqixiamofangan，danshiaiyufumuzaiouchenjiazuqiyeshangban，xuanzerenqitunsheng。

zheigeshihouxiamoshibuaiouchende，lianggerenjiusuanshiqinglv，xiamoduitagengxiangshiduilaobandetaidu。

 xiamoyekewangjiaopengyou，youzhengchangdeshenghuo，danshicengjingdeouchenganshetajiaoyou，meiyouzijidekongjian，duiyudulinvxingxiamolaishuo，gentajiaowangwuxingzhongfangfodaishanglejiasuo。

 liangrenguanxifenbenglixidedaohuosuoshiouchenduiluoxidediyi，ganjuedaozijikuaishiquxiamo，chushousongzouluoxi，yiweizheiyangjiukeyibaohuhaozijihexiamodeguanxi，jieguoquebaxiamotuidegengyuan。

erzuihoujinglizhongzhongbianguhewuhui，ouchenkaishimanzhangdewanhuixiamozhilu。

taneijujingdiantaici“xiamo，woshiainide，dannishiziyoude”liuxialexiamo。

 zheicidexiamoshixinganqingyuandeliuzaitashenbian，yinweiouchenshentilixingdizhengmingzijigaidiaolekongzhiyu，youlezunzhongxiamodexiangfa。jinvshengziyou，zuihounvshengxuanzezoujinhunyindeweicheng。

 nvshengzhisuoyihaipazoujinhunyin，daduoshidanxinhunhounanfanghuiguanshuziji，bunengxiangcongqianyiyangyouzijideshenghuo，yaoweizhelaogonghaizidazhuanshiquziwo。 qinggannantihenxinlei？10skuaisushenqingqingganzhenduan！

 danshiruguolingyibantitieqizidebuyi，buquqiangqiu，zhudongguanxinqizi，qiziyehuizuochujijifankui，yuduifanggoutong，zhudongchengdanyibufenjiatingzerengan。

 kaokongzhishidebudaoaide，jiuxianghanfengtongyangguangbisai，kansheinengtuoxialurendeyifu，hanfengjuedezheihaibujiandan，tadeyidi、pinmingdichuiachui，lurencubujifang，heleyitiao，ganmangjingjuedibayifuguodegengjin。

 ertaiyangnuanyangyangdizhaozhe，lurenkaishijuedehaonuan，henfangsong，ranhoutaiyangmanmanjiadareliang，lurenjuederele，zhudongtuoxiawaitao，hengqixiaoqu，jintiandetaiyanghaoshufua。

 “xingyoubude，fanqiuzhuji。”jishifanshengziji，zuihououchende“fangshou”fanerdedaolexiamozouxindehuigui，liangrenguoshanglexingfudeshenghuo。

3、学会信任对方

youxienanshengquefaanquangan，tebieshijiaodaoyouxiunvpengyoudeshihou，henxiangshikezhangwoduifangxingzong。

wodepengyouxiaoxi，tadeqiannanyoujiushiduominglianhuancallaihaozhe。

 youyicichuchakaihui，tashoujijingyin，jieguotananyoujitadaleershijigedianhua，batahedaole。houlaitahuidianhuaguoqu，nanyouhenshengqijuedetayouwenti，shibushiheqitayixingzaiyiqi，huaiyitachuchakaihuishishuohuang。

benlaikaihuijiuyijinghenleidexiaoxi，tingwangengjiapibeibukan。

 pingshixiaoxizhiyaojiaban，tananyoubujinmeiyoudanxinerqiebaoyuantabuguanjialideshi，bugouxianhui，buzuojiawu，tongshihaimiqieguanzhuxiaoxiheqitayixingdelaiwangqingkuang，chashouji，ganshexiaoxijiaoyou。

 houlaiyicijiliedezhengchaozhong，xiaoxitilefenshou。tananyoushuo：“nizaojiuxiangfenshouleba，zaojiuzhidaonvshengdoushibukekaode。”xiaoxihenshengqidanshiyijingbuxiangzaijieshishenmele。

 womenyongyuanjiaobuxingyigezhuangshuideren，qiannanyoudeluojishi：nimeiwenti，zhengmingjiwokan。xiaoxirenweipingbaiwuguhuaiyihekongzhilingyiban，benshenjiushishanghai。

 jiuxiangxiaoxizenmejieshiqiannanyoujiushibuxiangxinta，juedetayouwenti。nanshengjidumeiyouanquangan，huoxushizhiqianshouguoshang，huoxushiyuanshengjiatingdewenti，danshizheixiewentidoubuyingyounvshengqubeifu。

 zhishaozaiqiannanyouyanli，tazhidaozheiyangbuxinrendetaiduhuishanghaixiaoxi，querengranwoxingwosu，shuomingzaitayanlixiaoxideganshoubuzhongyao，neimexianranduiziyouduhexinrenduyouyaoqiudexiaoxi，xiangzaiqiannanyouneihuodexingfushitianfangyetande。

 houlaixiaoxiyudaoxianzaidelaogong，chulejiabanhepengyoujuhui，tadouyuanyihuaxinsizaijiali，buyonglaogongshuofanerhuizhudongbaobei。jiuqiyuanyinqishihenjiandan，tazaixianrenlaogongzheilihuodejidadexinren。

 yiqian，qiannanyouzhaobudaota，dadianhuanengdajishige，xianzailaogongzuiduodaliangge，yinweitalaogongshuo：“dadiyigekenengnizaimang，dadiergenibujie，shuomingmeikandao，nikanleziranhuiwo，meibiyaoyizhida，ruguobanishoujidameidianle，niqibushigengnanhuiwo。”

 zhiyujiawu，xiaoxilaogonghuiqiangzhezuo，fanerxiaoxihuibuhaoyisi，zhudongdadaxiashou。tahaigulixiaoxiyouzijidexingquaihao，pingshixiaoxixihuanlaxiaotiqin，tadelaogongshideguanzhong。

renhenvshengzaiyudaoyigexiangxinziji，xinshangzijidelingyibandoushinanyoudikanglide。

 sanmaohehexideaiqingyizhidedaoshirendexianmu，hexiyebushizuoyongwanguanjiacai，querangsanmaoyiwufangudigenzhetaqusahala。jiuxiangtamencengyouguodezheiduanduihua：

hexi：suidexin，keyiyongjiaoshuibatazhanqilai。

sanmao：nianguohou，haishiyoufengde。

hexibasanmaodeshoulaxiangtadexiongkou，shuo：“zheibianhaiyouyike，shihuangjinzuode，banineikenaguolai，womenjiaohuanyixia。”

haodeairenhuizhiyunvsheng。neixienengdadongruizhinvshengxindenansheng，wangwangkaodejiushiqingshenchudebaoronghetiliang。

hexibucengshufusanmao，hunhousanmaoruhunqianyiyangsatuo，xiewenzhang，peitaqusahala，xingfudexianshapangren。

zhenzhengdongaidenanren，huixiangxufuxiangyiyangchongaichenyihan，xiwangtajinqingdizuoziji，chongerbujiao；

xiangouchenyiyangzouxinzhichixiamo，suiranwoshiainide，dannishiziyoude；

xiangxiaoxilaogongyiyang，wennuanxinrenzhelingyiban；

像荷西一样治愈系。

xiangfan，xiangxiaoxiqiannanyouyiyang，huaiyi、jifengzhihuibaairentuidegengyuan，shangdegengshen，zijiyebuhuihuodexingfu。

nanhaizimen，gaosunimenyigemimiba：nvhaizibuhuibeichonghuai，zhihuiyuechongyueaini。

文|情感作者·姜美杉