怎么不卑不亢的挽回婚姻

　　zenmebubeibukangdewanhuihunyin，yingduiqiannanyou，henduorendouhuishenxiandanxin：xianghehao，youdanxinyicuozaicuo;bufuhexing，youwangbudiaoyiwangdeaiqing。shijishangnengfouheqianrenfuhe，bingbushikao“juede”huo“bulizhi”suojuedingde，fanershikeyitongguoguanchaxijiewenti、zhengliguanjianwentilaipanding。zhangwozheixiepanduanfangfa，keyibangnirenqingzheifenganqingdaodizhibuzhidewanliu，bimianmangmutouruhuoliuyouyihan。

　　一、首先看“分手的原因”：能不能处理是复合型的前提条件

　　fenshoudeyuanyinshitixiannengbunengfuhexingdeguanjian——ruguodangshidemaodunshi“kejiejuede”，fuhexingdegailvjiudale;jiarushi“quanjuxing、wufadiaohewenti”，jiusuanlinshifuhexing，yehenrongyizaidufenli。

　　lirudangshiyouyu“goutongbudaowei”fenkai，lirulianggerenyudaokunnanzonglengbaoli、buxuehuihuanweisikao，zhihoushuangfangrenshidaozijidenanti，naizhizizhuxuexiguogoutongdejiqiao，zheiyangdeqingkuangxia，fuheleaiqingfanerhuigengchijiu;danruguoyinwei“jiazhiguannianyanzhongbufu”，biruniyaojinzaoquqishengzi，lingyifangjianchibuxiedingkeyizuqiejuebutuoxie，huoyin“yuanzewenti”，liruwaiyu、mengpian，qielingyifangmeiyouwanquanhuiguo，zheiyangdeqingkuangxia，jibianfuhexing，congqiandefenqirengjiuhuibianchengaiqingdeanquanyinhuan。fenbianshiyingkeguanxing：bieguangkan“biaocengyuangu”，liru“zhengchaocishupinfan”，yaoshenrufenxiqibeihoude“guanjianfenqi”，wenziji“zheizhongqingkuangxianzaihainengchulima?shuangfangnenggouweichuliwentiqinfenma?”。jinyouguanjianfenqinengjiejue，fuhexingcaihuiyouyiyi。

　　二、观查“互动交流情况”：是否存在“双向性在乎”

　　fuhexingbingbushiyigerendeshi，bixushuangfangdoushi“yizhizouxiaqudexiangfa”。zixiguanchagenqianrenzhijiandehudongqingkuang，nengkanchulaibicizhijianshibushizaiyilingyifang，zheiyeshifenbiannengbunengwanhuideguanjianshujuxinhao。

　　jiaruheqianrenliaotianshi，lingyifangbingbushifuyanleshidi“ng”“e”，erhuizhudongfenxiangrichang，liru“jintianchidaoyijiachaohaochidehuoguo，xiangqilenizhiqianzongshixihuandianneigehuoguoguodi”，shenzhihaihuizaihuniderichangshenghuo，liru“wojidenijinqizaiqiuzhi，youheshideshijima?”，biaominglingyifangxinlihaiyouni;zhiyaoduifangyuanyigennixianxiajuhui，xiangjianshibuhuikeyishengshu，fandaohuiliaodaoyiwangzuimeihaodehuiyi，shenzhizhudongtanjiduiweilainiantou，liru“ruguodangshiwomenkeyihaohaotantan，kenengjiubuhuilihunle”，zheiyeshizaiyidezhuyaobiaoxian。neiruguotaduinidexinxiyizhigehenjiucaihui，xiangjianshiquanguochenglengdan，naizhimingqueshuo“buxiangtiguoqu”，biaomingtayijingxuehuifangxia，zheishihouqiangzhifuhexingzhihuirangnifushang。fenbianhudongjiaoliuqingkuangdeguanjianzaiyu“kanshuangzhongfanying”：biezhikandaozijiduojiji，xukanduifangshibushiyou“huifudejiqing”，jinyoushuangxiangxingzaihu，fuhexingcaihuiyoujiben。

　　三、思索“要求契合度”：现今你还适合吗?

　　ganqingzhong，“yaoqiupeidui”zhiguanzhongyao——dangshizaiyiqishi，nideyaoqiushibushidedaomanzu?fenkaizhihou，bicidexuyaoshifouyouzhuanbian?xianjindajia，shibushihainengmanzubicizhijiandejibenxuqiu?zheizhijieguanxifuheledeaiqingpinzhi。

　　birushuonicongqiandejibenxuqiushi“beishouhou”，qiannanyouyinweigongzuomangzonghushini，zaochengfenkai;rujinqiannanyouxiugailegongzuoqiangdu，yishidaolepeibandezhongyaoxing，dannixuehuilelejieduifanggongzuo，zheiyangdeqingkuangxia，yaoqiuqihedutisheng，fuhelebijiaorongyixingfukuaile;danruguonideyaoqiuyijiushi“pingwenpeiban”，erqiannanyourujingengzaiyi“gongzuofazhan”，naizhifanganquwaidigongzuo，biciyaoqiuhuoshiwufadiaohe，jibianfuhexing，haihuizaiduyouyuyaoqiubuyizhifashengzhengzhi。sisuoyaoqiuqihedushi，yaochengshimianduizijigenduifang：buyaoyong“yiwangdeaiqing”bangpiaoxianjinyaoqiu，wenziji“worujingengxuyaodeshinaxie?qiannanyounengjiwoma?woyounengmanzuqiannvyoudeyaoqiuma?”。jinyouyaoqiurengranpeidui，fuheledeaiqingcainenggenghao。

　　四、当心“复合型错误观念”：不要被“执着”或“孤单”欺诈

　　zenmebubeibukangdewanhuihunyin，henduorenxiangfuhexing，bingbushi“haixihuan”，zhishiyinwei“zhizhe”huo“gudan”——lirubugandangshideaiqingjiuzheiyangjieshu，huoshizanshimeiyujiangenghaoderen，xiangzhaoyigeqiannanyoumibukumen。zheixiewuquyehuirangnizuochucuowudepanduan，yizhiyudangezishen。

　　birushuonijinjinhuailian“yiwangdemeimiao”，quehushiledangshifenshoudeshihoudekuchu，liruqiannanyoucengyiduduizijidelengbaoli、fourenzijidefuchu，zheiyangdeqingkuangxia，fuhexinghuirangnizaiduqinshenjinglisunhai;huozheshiniyinweijimoxianghehao，liruzhouweipengyoudouyoubanlv，zishengandaogudan，jiuxiangheqianrenfuhe，zheilei“weilenengbaituogudufuhe”，shizhishangshiduizishengenduifangdebufuze。dangxinfuhexingcuowuguanniandeguanjianzaiyu“fenbiandongyin”：jingxialaiwenyixiaziji“woxianghehao，shiyouyuhaiaiduifangciren，yeshiyinweiwangbudiaoyiwang，huoshipajimo?”。jinyoudongyinchuncuijiushi“haixihuan、haixiangyaogenduifanghaohaozouxialai”，fuhexingcaizhidechangshi。

　　fenbiannengfouheqianrenfuhe，bixulixingheganxingronghe——bujinkankeguancunzainantikefouchuli，haiyaokanbicidexiangfayuxuqiushifouyizhi，haixuyaojingtizijidezhizhehecuowuguannian。jiarujingguorenzhenfenbian，fajueguanjianfenqinengjiejue、shuangfangdoushizaihu、yaoqiurengranpeidui，qiedongyindanchun，neiyangkeyichangshimaikaifuhexingdeyibu;neiruguofaxiandewentinanyijiejue、weiyounidanfangzaihu，huoshidongjishizhizhehuogudan，neiyanglijixuehuifangxia，shiduizijiyuguoquaiqingdezhongshi。ganqingzhongmeiyoujuedui“neng”huo“bukeyi”，guanjianzaiyugenjulixingpanduan，zuochuburangzijihouhuidetiaoxuan。