怎样爱一个人?婚姻的本质是什么？

 yishengzhinengaiyigema？qianduanshenghuo，xiaojuanzaizhenghunwangzhanshanglejieleyiweichenggongnanshia，jijijianmianjiadianhuajingonghou，lianggerenjianjiandigangkaishizhouqixingdeyouhui，bingyiqinglvxiangdang，danahaoxiangbingbingbushineimajizhewanhun，shoujiyezonghuiyouhetarendeaimeiduanxinheshengengbanyedianhua，xiaojuanxiangduxianga，danhenxianzhulingyifangdexinbuquanzaitayigerendeshenshang。neimeyigerendelianaiyounaxieni?xiamianjiugensuixiaobianyiqilaikankanzenyangaiyigerendewenzhangba。

xiaojuanhenwunaidigenwoshuo：“woshiyaoxiangyifenhenjiandandeqingganme，ruhejiuneimanan?”

 wojiang：“xiaojuanya，nixuyaodebingbushipingpingchangchangdeqinggan。buranniweishenmemeiquyuenidepengyouhuoshitongxuementanlianai?zhishitiaoxuanyigeduiyixingpengyouyouyouhuoliyouwufashoufudequdechenggongnanren?jiarunixuyaodeshiyigeduidabufennvshengyouyouhuolidenanren，youqipantazhiguishuyuzishen，neinijiubukeyiqipansuiyueranbingqieyifanfengshun。youyuniyaodeaiqing，zishenjiubingbushidangranqingkuang。”

 xiaojuanyoudianjiangxinjiangyi，wojiang：“yaobuqingnigaosuwohaoduogekaoshiti，yishengzhinengaiyigema？kankanniduiganqingshibushiyoujibenchangshi，ganqingshibushihuikaizhandechenggongba。”

“weihenanrenyaozhuiqiuwanmeinvxing?”

“不清楚。”

“neinanrenweishenmebuzhuiqiuwanmeimuxiaohouzihuoshimuxingxing?”

“neihaowuyiwenburongyiya。”

“weihedabufennanrenyaozhuiqiuwanmeinianqingmeilidenvrenerbushirenlaozhuhuangdenvxing?”

“由于美了。”

“shenmeiguannianshisha?naxieyeshimeini?”

xiaojuanyoudianerciqiong，“neikenengshirendebennengba。”

henyihan，wojuedechulai，xiaojuanbingbulejieaiqingyuhunyinjiujingshishenme。tazhenduiganqingdecaokonglishifeichangdide。

yigebuqingchuaiqingyuhunyinshisha，youqipanhuodechaoguozishennenglifanchoudeairenderen，haowuyiwenhuibuchenggong。

guozhen，meiduojiu，xiaojuanfenshoule。

 hunyindeyiyishiyigeqiyueshu。zheiyiqiyueshubingbingbushiweilegenghaodilanmanhuoshiganqingerchuangjiande，zhishigenjuliangxingzhenduizisunhoudaideyangyuerchuangjiande。

 liangxingwangwangyaoqiandinghetong，ziranshihuxiangchaquebulou，yijizhizhang，huanbizhizhang，laixieliyangyuyigeyichuanjiyinfeichanghaodexiaohaizhangdale。

 zheibingbushishuowomendezuxianjiumeiyouaiqing，shijishang，yijuhaiwaijinhuaxinlixuedeyixiekexueyanjiu，renmennannvzhijianyiduiyidezhuanxiangguanlian，zaozaishangbaiwannianqianjiuchanshengle。hexinjiating(nuclearfamilies)shirenmenyuzhongbutongdeshetuanzuzhifangfa，tanannengkegui，erhunyinshenghuodeyuanxingxiangdajiarenmenzishenyiyanglishiyoujiu，bingbushixiangyouxierenxiangxiangdeneibanjinjinzaijinnianlaicaichuangjianqilaide。

 zhimingkepuwenxuejia、jianqiaodaxueshengwuxueboshiyanjiushengsaite•lideli(mattridley)，cengren《jingjixueren》lanmubianxie，zhuyouhaojibucansaizuopinbaohan《renleijiyinzu》、《lingminjiyin》、《hongsehuanghou》。cengbufajifengdizaitadejingdianzhuzuozhongxiedao：“ninengshuo，lanmandeai，shiyizhongshehuixianxiang，zaimanzheduogexinshijidechuantongshihejiaoyu。tashizaiaikuidanjunzhuailinuodehuanggong，huozhemouyineiyangdediqu，youyiqunxingyuqiangdezuojiachuangzaofamingde，tamenhaoweixingyinshiren;erzainayiqian，jiujinyouxing。”

 dangwomenjiandaozheiyiduandeqingkuangxia，buyouzizhuzanbujuekou。yigerendelianai,zheileichuaimodegerenxingweihaoxiangshiyizhongchangjianwenti，dajiayizhizaixiangxiangzishenyouzhejuewujinyou、meiyourenlejiedeganqing，erwomendepengyou、xianzu、zubeidoumeiyouaiqing，jinjinkaoshengzhixitongronghezaiyiqi。

 shijishang，siboli•zhankeweiyake(williamjankowiak)，diaoyanle168zhongbuyiyangdezhongzushijiyiyishangdewenhuayishu，fajuerenherendoulejieshenmeshilangmanzhiai。

 fenbugushendeganqingjinjinjishaoshu，zheixiepingpingdandandeyiyangnenggoubeichengzuoganqing。ganqingzishenshipaitadexingxingfen，zheibingbudanjinxianyushiyijianzhongqinghuanshiyijianzhongqing，zaimeishuozhiyanfumuzhimingdeguanlianlitayiyangnenggoucunyou。

 zenyangaiyigeren?zairenleiwenmingshang，dabufenqingkuangxia，nannvzhijianpingzhebennengfanyingdeyouhuoliheshimingganxiuchengzhengguo。weimeiaiqingzuoweizhaoduixiangdeguanjianyaosuzhizaiduanduandeshubainianneicunyou。danzaimouzhongyiyishang，bennengfanyingdeyouhuoliheshimingganshijishanghezhenzhengdeaiqingdengedede。huiguotoulai，ruguowomenbujuedetamenzhongjianjubeiganqing，dajiabianburongyichongzheyiduibaojingcangsangdelaonianren“xiangruyimobaitouxielao”dejiemianwailuyanxianhechongjingdeshense(jinguanwomenzhidaotamenwanhunyiqianmeiyoujianmian)。