夫妻之间沟通最恐惧死亡循环 三步处理交流障碍

夫妻之间 怎么相处?我问你，你一个礼拜家里的時间有是多少?你有木有陪过小孩玩?你算一算自身一共有多次送小孩去念书?你一天到晚每日在外边交际他人，你有没有想过最需要你陪的人你却沒有時间陪?我也不知道外边究竟有什么那么吸引住你?”

 meiyilianchuandezhiwen，rangtadezhangfuwulizhaojia，tadengzhetadelian，shuobuchulaihualai，banshangningshizhewojiang：“nikankan，tajiushishuoneimedezishenhewangdao，yigerenbaquanbudehuadoushuowanle，wozenmeshuohuabenzhimeiyouyong，ai!”zhangfuzhongzhongdetanleyikouqi，wanghoumiankaozaikaobeishang，yibushuohua。(fuqizhijianzenmexiangchu?zenmejingyinghunyin?

家里，她们都是那样沟通交流。

 qizigangjiangguoyiban，zhangfujiubukenduotan。xuduofuqidoujuedeyaoshilingyifangguanniandaonanti，zuochugenggai，nantijiuchulile，dannantidaodishisheiyeburongyicongzishendeluojixingheguandianzhizhongtuoxie。burongzhiyi，zheijiushishuozheizhongfuqidequexian，goutongbidingshenxianlewuxianxunhuan。

愿意结束无限循环，分三步：

baituowuxianxunhuan：tingzhishixiaogoutong

jutibuzhou：buzhiyi、bupaibi、buqianchewangshi、butieshangbiaoqian

yaojiechuzheiyiwuxianxunhuan，tamenbiciyaojiandaozheileigoutongfangfadeshixiaoxing，zhongzhiyongzheiyifangfazaicigoutong。

 genjuchizedefangfashimeifalingrenpingxinjingqidiqutingdedongshuohuarendezhenshiyongyi，lirumeihezhangfudegoutongfangfa，yizhengpianhuabudaitingdong，quanpianfanjie，genghaoxiangzhiyi，erbingbushizaihezishenzuiqinmijiechuderenbiaoshuzishendeyaoqiu。

 meidezhangfuni?“zishen”“wangdao”neiyangdecisuibiantiezaiqizishoushang，haoxiangjitadinglexing。renjiuzheiyang，nigengshitieshangbiaoqian，gengshibiaoshihua。zheijiudengyuzhangfuyongbiaoshikuangdingleqizi，shizhiyuelaiyuegeng“zishen”“wangdao”。

引深耕细作：懂得积极主动回复

jutibuzhou：fuweixintai，biaoshutihui，“niqidaiworuhezuo?”

 jiarubaituolemaiyuanyudanqiedegoutongwuxianxunhuan，goutongdexiayibu，shiyinjinxindebiaoshufangshi，jiangshengsedechize，bianchengwenhedechize。

 zuixianyaoxianxuehuifangxiazishendegongzuoyali，shizheconglingyifangdeshijiaolaisisuo，huifuyixiatadetihui，ba“yemeiyoufangfa”huanwei“niqidaiworuhezuo”，ranhou，zairanglingyifangjiangtatingjiandeguanjianzizhaochuqu，quedingzishentingjiandeshibushilingyifangyuanyibiaoshude，suihouhuifulingyifang。

jianghuiyikaishidajiahuiduizheileigoutongfangfajuedeshuyuanhebushihe，danyaoshiyongguojiulejie，zheileigoutongfangshishiyouxiaode。

创建新循环系统：带著难题生活

jutibuzhou：renshouquexian、peiyangxihao、baoliukongjian

 yingguozhimingdeshehuixuejiajohn gottmanzaijiangjin40nianduifuqiguanxidekexueyanjiusuanchuyigeyiju：hunyinshenghuozhongyoujuedaduoshudenantishimeifachulide。lirufuqilianggerenzaishenghuofangshicengmiandebuyiyangyoushihouhuirangxianghunanyirenshou，xiaofeiguandebuyiyangyehuichanshengxuduodemaodun，yeyoushenghuoqijuzhongyouxianxuanzejilvdefenpeideng。

 yinci，jiranneimeduodenantimeifachuli，zuyidaizhuzheizhongnantizaicishenghuozaiyiqini?zheidoushiweichihunyindeyizhongguanjiandegongzuonengli。

 renmenwubilejiedaohunyinshenghuobingbushijizhide，bingbushimeiyouquexiande，lirumoheqineijianshiqing，xuduoshenghuofangshihegongtongaihaoshijishangshimoheqisuzaoqilaide，renbingbushiyichengbubian，fuqishidudisuzaoyixiegongtongaihao，liruchunyou、kandianshiju，weizijigudingbudongdeshijianqupeiyangyixianggongtongaihao，neibianshifuqijinhoudexinyoulingxihezhuiyi。

 zhenduizheixiemeifadadaotongyidenanti，fuqijiannenggouliuchugerenkongjianheyinsibaohu，liruzhangfuxiaijiucai，buyidingyaosheqiuqiziyexiai;qizixiaihanguodianshiju，yewuxuqianglazhangfuyiqikan。zenmejingyinghunyin?