花镇情感咨询靠不靠谱？让你保持魅力的不是神秘感而是成长

 jinqigenzuihaodepengyouxianliao，tagaosuwo：“worenweihunyinguanxizhongliangrenyingdangxianghubaocuncengcigan，huazhenqingganzixunkaobukaopu？neiyangcaihuiyizhiyouxiangyaoqutanxundechongdong，caihuiyizhiyouyouhuoli。”

 zheijuhuawoyebuzhidaoyiqiantingduoshaorenshuoguo。dajiahaoxiangzaoyipingdinglezheiyiweichi“fengcai”demiji：weichicengcigan，bubiquandourangairenlejie，neiyangcaikeyiweichizhangqidefengcai。

 mamanaizhigaozhiwojiang：“qinaidedeguinv，zheigexingqingbudahao，duixinpengyouyexunsujiudakaixinfeidegoutongjiaoliu，neiyangbutaihao，meiyoucengcigan。”

 jinrijoypengyoujiucongshehuixinlixueshijiaopoyipo，weishenmezaihunyinguanxizhongrangjinifengcaidebingbushicengcigan，zhishifazhan。

层次感能使你走多远?

 cengciganzuixianjiubufuromanticpsychology(youbixudepenyouqingchayueshuben：mandishehuixinlixue—thepsychologyofromanticlove)：zaiwanshandeaizhong，dajiawangwanghuiaishangyigeren，shiyouyuwomenzaita/tadeshenshangzhaodaofanshemianhuijiadezishen，yejiushishuo，womenzaitamendeshenshangzhaolaidaozishendeshengming，tamenshiwomendeshengmingyongyou“youcikejianxing”。

 yizhaozheiyibiaozhuneryandehua，shenmishijishangdaliangjiyudajiadeshineileitanxundejidongganhezaodongbuangan，youyubulejielingyifang，womendeaiqingbidingbushiwanshande，huoshiyagentanbushangai。

 zirancengciganzaiyiduanguanliandezuikaishihuanshihenyouyouhuolide，youyudajiaduibumingdeshiqingyizhitianmanhaoqixin。danzheizhendeshidajiaxiaicengcigandesuoyouyuanguma?

 worenweicengciganzuixiyinrende，shijishangshidajiadetouying。youyubulejie，yinci dajiayoufeichangdaxiangxiangdeshineikongjian，womenkeyibazijizhenduilingyifangdexiangxiangdoutouyingdaota/tadeshenshang。youshiwonaizhiganjuedajiabingbuyuanyiqujiekailingyifangdeshenmimianju，shiyouyudajiaxinlidanxinzishendetouying，zailingyifangxianchuzuibenqueshizishenshi，huaweipaoying。

一段真实完善的关联

huicongchengxianzuizhenzhengdezishengangkaishi。

 cengciganhuishinizouyiduan，danshijidouhuilaiyueni。jiaruniyizhizaihunyinguanxizhong“baocun”neiyangdecengcigan，ninandaoshuobuparuguoniweichishenmidediqunanyibimiandebeilingyifangzhangwodaodeqingkuangxia，shijishangnibingbufuta/tadetouyingma?

 wanshenmi，tashi2gebuchengshuderen，weilegenghaodifangzhizhenshixianghuxinrenerxianghushengchanzhizaode“ganqingdeshenying”。tajinjinyoudianxiangganqingbale。

 youyunidemeiyouanquangan，nihaipazailingyifangyanqianpuluzuizhenshideziji，zheixienizuizhenzhengdeniantouheganqing，nixuyao“shenmi”laiyangaizishendejiaolvqingxuhezaodongbuan;dannideairenyedanxinzishendetouyingchengweipaoying，yinci gancuimeiquchichibuqutanxunnide“shenmi”。

大家共享资源的，是对感情的害怕，而不是感情。

jiniweichifengcaidebingbushicengcigan

只是发展

jiranweichishenmimeiyouyong，jiujingnaxieyouxiao?

fazhan!erqiejinyoufazhan!

 lingrenbeitongdeshishiduoshaonvhairenweihunyinguanxizhongrangzishenfengcaibaozhangdeshijijinzhemodejueshijianfeihuoshiqumeirongdianzuoyigezhengrongshoushu，zaihuoshishimaihuilaishipukexueyanjiudalianglaogongxiaidetesemeishi。zheizhongwupinhuoxuhuijiniyishizhijianyuelaiyuegengyoufengcaiyidiandian，danqingxiangxinwo(xiaohuozimenyeshiyiyang)，zhenshishinizaihunyinguanxizhongweichifengcaide，zhiyoufazhan。

 shenmeshichengzhang?fazhanjiushizhinichixudezhuiqiuwanmeiziwojiazhi，duizishenzhenxinshiyi(integrity)，chixudezishentanxunheziwojiena，bingchixugengyouaiyubuaidegongzuonengliyigequanguocheng。zaizheigequanguochengzhongnixuyaolijingdemolianyaobijieshijianfeihuoshizhengxingshoushuduohenduo，wonengshuotamenyagenbingbushiyigeliangjide!

 liruruguonishiyigejiaoweilixingderen，dannidelixinglaizizhangqidegenzishenxintaidefenlichulai(henyoukenengnimamazainixiaodeshihouduinishuo：naneryouleibuqingdanzheilei)，neimaniyizhizaihunyinguanxizhongdetiaozhanhefazhan，bianshixuehaofajuezishendexintaierqiekeyizhenxinshiyidegennideairengoutongjiaoliunidexintai。

 jinxingzheiyijianshier，henyoukenengjiushiniyibeizidekecheng：huazhenqingganzixunkaobukaopu？nixuyaochixudeyingduizishen，zaigenxintaifenlichulaihenjiuleyihounixuyaozaicixuezheruhequtihuizishendexintai;erqieyouyuhenjiumeiyouchupeng，ruguoniganshoudaoxintaishi，niyidingshihenxinshenbuningde，youyunidouhaimeidiaozhengtamendegongzuonengli，yinci nixuyaohuahaozhangshijianquxuehaodiaozhengtamen;suihouhenyoukenengniyeyoukechengyaojinxing，youyuhunyinguanxixiangyaoniyichengxiangdaideyingduizishendexintaierqiegenairenyichengxiangdaidegongxiang，erneiyanggongxiangzaiyicixiangyaonijudadedanliang......

 woneiyangjiangwanniyejiudongle，fazhanbiquanbubiedewaizaidegaibiandounannengkeguiduo!zheiyeshiweishenmeyouderenningkezaozuiqugaibianwaizai，quebuyuanyiyingduizishendexinli。

为何发展会使我们

zaihunyinguanxizhongweichifengcaini?

 yuangufeichangjiandan，youyubufazhanhuijiniyuelaiyuegubuzifengerqiehenfawei，bingqiehunyinshenghuozhong99%demaodundouxiangyaonidefazhan(erbushichangshigaibianlingyifang!)caikeyihuodechuli。lirunideairenduinixiyanzheiyijianshierhenbumanyi，nizijiyegaoqingchuxiyanshijishangzaiweihaizheyijiarendeshenxinjiankang，neimashifoudingchouyandeweihaierqiezaicichouzherangjinifengcai，huanshiyichengxiangdaideyingduizishendeyanyinlaierqieqiuzhubatajiechujinigengyoufengcai?wojuedehuidaxianeryijian。

 zaiwomenzuizhenxinshiyideyingduizishenshi，shijishangdajiahuodedeshizishendexinrenganheshangxi。neiyangdedajialianzishendoujinbuzhuaishangle，dajiadeairendoubuchuwaiya!

ruguonifuwuchengnuozishenqujinxingnizuixiangjinxingdezongtimubiao(erbushitarendexiwanghuoshiwaibudehaowuyiwen)

ruguonixinlitianmanhaipadanshinimeiyouduobizishendehaipazhishizhimiankongjuerqieyiranquzuozheiyijianjinidanxindeshiershi

ruguonirenkezhezishendejiaolvqingxu，maozhebeiairenhuijuedefengxianxingqutanluzishenxinlizuizhenzhengdeganqinghebixushi

quanshinizaiairenyanzhonghuishanshanfaliangdeshike!

youyuni，zaifazhanerqiechengweiniziji!

hunyinguanxishizenyangxiezhunifazhande?

 ruguonirengzaiyouhuihuoshijiehundehuanjie，niyuairenhuizaixianghudehaowuyiwenzhongfazhanchuhunyinguanxi，zheileirangbierenrentonghehaowuyiwendehunyinguanxidajiachengweibierenrentongdehunyinguanxi(other-validatedintimacy)。henduorenzhaoxunyizhongxingyingbuli，xianghukegumingxinderenkeerqieyouyizhong“dajia”dejuede。

 danhenbeijudeshi，zhangqixingdehunyinguanxibixudajiayoushenfenrentongdeqinmiwujian。hunyinshenghuohehunyinguanxiyibanquanshixiangyaonibaituozishendeshushiquan，youyu“qinmiwujian”youshibingbingbushineimadeganjuelianghao。

 yigeyoudianernanjieshoudezhenzhishi：gennideairenqinmiwujianbingbudaibiaozheninenghuodeniyaoxiangdedafu。shijishang，dajiameiyigerendouqipanbeijiena，buqidaiyoubeijujuedetihui。dajiadouqidaijuedeanquanxingerqiebeiweihu。